Merry Christmas!!!

Sorry this is coming late, but u know, its when I'm at work that i can blog, and we were given a little Christmas break. Merry Christmas in arrears!!! How did u spend your Christmas????

Also, I'm soo sorry for not being regular this period. u know its towards the year and, and we Accountants have to do a lot of balancing and all that shit to do this period. Did I just call it ''shit''??? lol. No oh!!! its not ''shit'' before my oga go see this post come sack me. Lol. Anyways, I miss u guys. I mean, I miss blogging. For introverts like me, this is a nice medium for me to pour out my heart. Mehn, catch y'all later. Love u too!!!

Christmas gift for y'all!!!

I wanna surprise y'all.

Christmas shopping done.

I got everyone, every damn reader of this blog a gift.

#WORD

I don't have an EX. If its OVER, then it NEVER HAPPENED.

#WORD

Question of the day!!!

Can u invite your EX to your wedding?

Joke of the day

A professor of mathematics sent a fax to his wife. It read:

"Dear wife,

You must realize that you are 54 years old and I have certain needs which you are no longer able to satisfy. I am otherwise happy with you as a wife, and I sincerely hope you will not be hurt or offended to learn that by the time you receive this letter, I will be at the Grand Hotel with my 18-year-old teaching assistant. I'll be home before midnight.

- Your Husband"

When he arrived at the hotel, there was a faxed letter waiting for him that read as follows:

Why some guys dump ladies after a short relationship.

Well! Well! Well! The question that haunts the minds of almost all the women and many of the men, is indeed thought-provoking. What are the reasons for a man dumping a woman, (and sometimes women doing the same with men)? When I asked this question to a white South African, she replied, "Men dump women because men are men and women are women".

Oh God! This intriguing and quite amusing answer really left no doubts in my mind about various unusual aspects behind this riddle. Let us discuss some of the basic causes for this Dumping act:

Question of the day!!!!!

Is there anything wrong if you borrow your boyfriend money to come pay your bride price ??

#WORD

She'll cry, and get over it, she'll hate you, and then love you again, but one day she'll leave... and she wont come back.

#WORD

Joke of the day!!!

WHO IS SMARTER?

Last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. As our passion began to heat up she said,"I don't feel like it. I just want you to hold me."I said, “WHAT?! What was that?!"She said,"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."She responded to my puzzled look by saying,"Can't you just love me for who I am and not wat I do for you in the bedroom?"Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

Im back!!! Who missed me?????

 

Im back peeps!!! Im back. I told y'all I'll be off for a while cos of exams, rite???? Well, Im finally back!!!  As for the exams........hmmmmm......well........na God hand ee dey oh!!! I wrote 3 papers. ope it turns out alrite.

Also, my B'day was last friday. You can imagine, that was the day MTN decided to shut down network, that they want to upgrade. I couldnt recieve a single call, or text message. Also, everyone else travelled, leaving just me and my elder brother at home. the guy no kuku send me. dey suggest make we drink garri sleep, for dinner. Imagine. Lol. Awful mehn. Well, the day finally turned out cool. a group of friends came around to my house around 8pm, they surprised me. First, the joined us in eating the garri and suya, captioned us the "Garri drinkers club", then, wen I stepped in for a few minutes, i came out to see the whole house set. They brought everything that could make a nice birthday happen, and made my day. See groove mehn. Was soo cool!!!

Well, Im back Niggas and Nigresses, Fuckers amd Fuckees, Freaks and Fracks, Dudes and Duddets. see y'all tomorrow!!!  

Gilda Amata, Ruke Amata's wifes' Infidelity exposed!!!!

Curlled from Linda Ikeji's blog, and I took it exactly as I saw it. sad mehn. Very sad.

What you are about to read will shock you, disgust you and open your eyes to a lot of things going on in this country. Story written by Stella Dimoko Korkus for Encomium magazine. Unbelievable! Read it below...

The story that has unfolded in the home of actor, Ruke Amata and the famous Amata clan is the type found in the kind of movies you watch in Nollywood, unbelievable and shocking. Are you married and into runs and have information on your phone that might nail you? Please check your phone and delete before you read further as this could be you!

Pretty Gilda Amata has a can of worms that has been opened, given away by her blackberry phone. According to insiders, ‘Someone got hold of Gilda’s phone and downloaded the content of her black berry chat and the shocking contents were love/sex chats between her and a top politician whose wife she calls 'Aunty’, a serving Governor and several others. Gilda met the serving Governor through actress, Omoni Oboli and the rest is history’.

Question of the day!!!

Good morning my people!!! How are y'all doing today????

Here comes, our question of the day.

What do you normally do after Sex??

 1. Sing,
 2. Laugh
 3. Sleep
 4. Turn to the opposite direction
 5. Thank ur mate
 6. Say I need more

 Any other (specify)

For me, I go to the bathroom and wash off!!!! lolzzzzzzz.................so, y'all, whats your answer???

Joke of the day!!!

AT WORK,

Michael: Why you white guys always so happy?

Casey: Because I make love to my wife every morning before work.

Michael: Say whaaat? You get her to make love EVERY morning? How do you do that?

Casey: It’s easy, I just say a poem, women love poems and will fall for them all the time.

Michael: Ok, what kind of poem can you say to make her make love every morning?

Casey: I say, "blonde hair, blonde hair, eyes of blue, I love to wake up and make love to you.

Michael: ha ha ha ha ha..... she falls for that?

Casey: yes you should try it.

NEXT DAY MICHAEL COMES IN WITH BLACK EYE FAT LIP AND A TOOTH MISSING.

#WORD

Someone will marry the girl you dumped. Another girl who has been dumped will be your wife. Its a circle. All na FAIRLY USED.

Ha ha ha.

#WORD

He loves me, but he cheats!!!

I'm a 30 years old attractive woman. I'm currently very confused about my love life in general and I need other people's views. I'm in a relationship with a promising man who's is 31 years old and we've been together for approximately 7 years now. This incredible man have showed love in different ways. He fully support me financially and he even paid for my studies. I mean that he have invested thousands and thousands of bucks to me and loosing me will always be painful deep down in his heart because of all his financial investments. We live in different cities because of work. We see each other during the weekends. Last week I went to his place to surprise him during the day but he was busy with another woman but strangely last year I caught him with the same woman. But whenever I catch with with a woman he prefers not to open the door for me and pretend as if his not there even if his cars are on the property. I asked him a day after the incidence that why he hides and decides not to open the door whenever I catch him cheating and he said it because he prefer not to face me during the act and it because he tries to avoid any fighting that can occur between that woman and I. Friends I need help, is there a bright future in this relationship?

Photo of the day!!!

My husband wants a DNA test for his children. I'm sooo screwed!!!!

I was married for 7 years with no child and I was faced with pressure from my husband's people which was getting beyond me. My Husband Loved me and I do too. Some months later, I secretly had an affair with my ex whom I didn't reveal to my husband. After 2 weeks, the doctor confirmed me pregnant and I later made it look as though it was my Husband. I did that to save my Marriage cos I love him and don't want to loose him. 

Nine months later, I had a Baby Boy and we all rejoiced. It's been 5 years now and the boy is doing good, But then, I later had twins (Boy and Girl) from my Husband two years after I had the first Baby. It was a wonderful thing. Since then, everything has been  fine.

Question of the day!!!!

A real man wakes up horny.
True or False????


Mehn, me, I'm not giving any answer oh!!! lolzzzzzzz.........lemme here from u guys.

What we'll do if we had the opposite genitals for a day!!!

Rib cracking!!!! Here it goes

WHAT WOMEN WOULD DO IF THEY HAD A PENIS FOR A DAY

Get ahead faster in corporate America.

9. Get a blow job.

8. Find out what is so fascinating about beating the meat.

7. Pee standing up while talking to other men at a urinal.

6. Determine WHY you can't hit the bowl consistently.

5. Find out what it's like to be on the other end of a surging orgasm.

Sensitive parts of a woman....

Good morning y'all. I'm starting today's posts with this *lick lips* article. Enjoy.

Although almost all of woman's body is sensitive, but there are some areas that with kissing or touching can make her knees go week. She can easily be aroused and turned on. These parts or areas are as following.

Behind the ears- The best way to appeal to a woman is to blow behind her ear. Even the slightest of touches can turn her on and cause tremendous physical arousal. Ear lobes are one of the most sensitive parts of the female body.

The neck- This is one of the most sensitive parts of the female body including ear lobes. Slight tickles behind the neck or maybe some soft kissing can arouse the woman within seconds and get her ready for almost anything.

Continue

Joke of the day!!!!

Joe was a successful lawyer, but as he got older he was increasingly hampered by incredible headaches. When his career and love life started to suffer, he sought medical help. After being referred from one specialist to another, he finally came across an old country doctor who solved the problem. 

 "The good news is I can cure your headaches... the bad news is that it will require castration." You have a very rare condition which causes your testicles to press up against the base of your spine and the pressure creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles." 

Photo of the day!!!

Ha ha ha ha...........really DIRTY things!!!

Is it LUST or LOVE???????

Let's Take a Look at a Relationship that is of Lust and One that is of Love

Lust will do all the things that love does. It will wine and dine you. It will tell you it loves you and they want to marry you. However, when comes time to proving what they are saying it's a totally different attitude that you get.

Lust will speak in terms of "me" and "mine". Lust will most of the time not inconvenience itself for you. Lust will use arguments between the 2 of you as a time to venture off into seeing other people. Lust is driven off sex not you. Lust will most of the time put your feelings 2nd.

Question of the day!!!!

Is it wrong to carry your girlfriend's handbag? 

Hmmmmm.....what a question. I heard its the 'in' thing right now in Abuja. You'll see a slim lanky girl walking with a heavily built man, and the dude is freaking carrying her bag!!! I no fit. As in, I cant fit. I can imagine my mentor, David Deangelo hearing I did such. He'll sure fly all the way from the US down to Nigeria to slap the wuss out of me!!! well, those of you that do it, lemme hear your opinion, maybe I might see reason with you. So, over to y'all. 

She denies me sex!!!

I am 34 years, married to a 28 years old Lady. Whenever I ask my wife for sex, she'll always refuse. Its once in a long while that she will agree to have sex with me. I trust her, she's not the kind of woman that will be flirting around. Since we got married and got blessed with a beautiful child, that's when I started seeing this funny and strange attitude in her, and i love sex so much. I don't want to cheat on my wife. I have talked to her many times that she might push me out there, and make me cheat on her, yet she doesn't care. I don't know what to do Please advise me.

#WORD

When TRUST is broken, "SORRY" means NOTHING.

#WORD

We are both AS.............

Hey guyz!! I need your advice. I'm 29 years old, and want to get married. I've been dating a girl for 12 years now. She just graduated, but the problem is that were both text "AS" blood group!!! I love this girl so much because he actually helped me out in many ways when I was in the university!!! Should I go on to marry her? Please, advice me. 

Happy new month!!!!

Happy new month!!! Wish you all your desires this month!!!

Feels good to have been blogging for exactly one month. Wow!!! What an experience. Lemme use this medium to formally.....ehmmmm......ehmmmmmm....how dem dey use talk am sef????

*clears throat*. Lemme use this opportunity to formally make known to you the standard columns we'll be having every day.

• Joke of the day
• #WORD
• Photo of the day
• Question of the day

Apart from these columns, we'll also be having out regular sex and relationship related articles, and different people's issues needing advice.

I want to say, thank you very much for being with me this past month. I wouldn't have been able to do it without you. *kiss* *kiss*

My boyfriend is stingy!!!

My boyfriend is very stingy, he doesn't give me money and he says he loves me. He only takes me out to buy drinks but he has never for once given me money. The only thing he knows is to ask for sex. I am tired. It is as if he is using me, I wonder what he does what his salary sef. there was even a time I went to his house with scattered hair, instead of him to give me money to fix my hair and look beautiful for him, he was asking of sex as if am an hotel. Please, I need your advice.

Hian. This one fear me oh!!!! oya, advice!!!

Joke of the day!!!

When nuns are admitted to Heaven they go through a special gate and are expected to make one last confession before they become angels.

 Several nuns are lined up at this gate waiting to be absolved of their last sins before they are made holy.

 "And so," says St. Peter, "have you ever had any contact with a penis?"

 "Well," says the first nun in line, "I did once just touch the tip of one with the tip of my finger."

 "OK," says St. Peter, "dip your finger in the holy water and pass on into heaven."

 The next nun admits, "Well, yes, I did once get carried away and I, you know, sort of massaged one a bit."

 "OK," says St. Peter, "rinse your hand in the holy water and pass on into heaven."

 Suddenly there is some jostling in the line and one of the nuns is trying to cut in front.

 "Well now, what's going on here?" says St. Peter.

 "Well, your excellency," says the nun who is trying to improve her position in line, "If I'm going to have to wash my mouth with that stuff, I want to do it before Sister Mary Thomas sticks her ass in it."

He doesn't want me!!!

I am a girl of 24 years old am into a relationship wit a guy, I love this guy so much, I respect him and give him all the attention he needs. Although he told me that he loves me so much, but he said he is not yet ready for a serious relationship until he is through wit his master's degree, and I agreed to wait. Now he is through and I asked him what his plans are now, towards our relationship. He then said that he want us to stop seeing each other. I asked why, and he said that he wants to become a born again, and that is why we can't date. Now my question is, am I a devil that will hinder his salvation? or is there someone else in his life? Please, u people should advice me on what to do, because I really love this guy. 

I dunno why, but, there's something funny about this story, and I was laughing when I got to the end of it. babe, you've really got a good sense of humour!!! Well, lets advice her.

#WORD

A girl who laughs at your dry joke during the first date doesn't have transport money.

Lwkmd. Hian. Okay oh.

#WORD

Difference between a GIRL and a WOMAN.........

A girl knows how to demand.
A woman knows how to contribute.

Girls complain too often.
A woman will observe for a while, and then call her man's attention to the matter arising.

Girls can spend 5k on ice cream;
A woman can manage 5k to cook for a week.

A girl will want to keep up with trends.
A woman will want to consider her man's progress....

A girl will never ask how he manages.
Caring after him is a woman's priority.

More after the cut

Photo of the day!!!!!

#GROSS!!!!!

Question of the day!!!

Ladies, will you have sex with your fiance after paying your dowry since he cant wait till the wedding night????

Naija girls ehnnnnn,,,,,,,kai!!!!

I was chatting with a friend of mine, and, the above is a part of the chat. I actually meant phone number at first.....but see as the Warri babe eye shine wen i mention account number????? Lwkmd. Wetin we no go see for this Naija?

Good morning Stimulucians!!!! ha ha ha ha ha

Good morning y'all. Hope u like the name I got for y'all. 

@ the pics, Yeah, that's my situation right now. I'm going gaga mehn. Got exams in December, and its those kinda exams, where u cant afford to fail. I'm sooo reading my freaken ass off!!! So, if I'm MIA for a while, don't miss me too much, alrite????? Thanks. Tk kia, Love you too.

Photo of the day!!!

Hian. I wonder too oh!!!!! Lmao.

#WORD

Boys ask for pictures with no clothes....................
Men ask for pictures with no make up..................

#WORD

Joke of the day!!!!

Two women meet in the afterlife............ Following is the conversation they had.

1st woman: Hi! My name is Wanda.

2nd woman: Hi! I'm Sylvia. How'd you die?

1st woman: I froze to death.

2nd woman: How horrible!

1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you?

2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.

1st woman: So, what happened?

2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds.I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.

1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer ... we'd both still be alive

Question of the day!!!!!

Y'all ladies that have experienced both, this is for you. Circumcised or uncircumcised penis does it really matter to you ladies???? Lets talk

Love, sex, and money.......Lets argue this out.

Okay. lets go there. very interesting.

It has been established that men can tell a woman what she wants to hear, buy her gifts, spend lavishly on her, do almost anything just to eat her pussy and quench their lustful desires. It has also been established that women can tell a man anything he would love to hear, call him pets names, proclaim love every minute to the man just to extort money from the man's pocket and bank account. The women will always comment on this page saying things like "must there be sex in a relationship?", 'Is sex love'. Where as you will see the men saying things like 'money is not love', 'boyfriend is not an ATM machine' etc. I agree with both parties because everyone wants to protect his/her interest. No one wants to be used like a tissue paper. Now my question is; When a man is in a relationship and decides to respect the woman's policy of no sex (Where obviously she is not a virgin) and concentrate on the friendship part of the relationship thereby proving to her that sex is not love, is it not fair that the woman should be sensible enough not to demand for money from the man so as to prove to him that money is not love? 

This is for argument purpose and for the matured minds. ha ha ha 

#WORD

Assumptions are the termites of relationships.  ~ Henry Winkler

#WORD

Joke of the day!!!!

There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the light.

Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figured she would break him out of this crazy habit. So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned on the lights.

She looked down. and saw her husband was holding a battery-operated leisure device ... a dildo! Soft, wonderful and larger than a real one.

She went completely ballistic. "You impotent bastard," She screamed at him, "How could you be lying to me all of these years? You better explain yourself!"

The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly: "I’ll explain the toy ... you explain the kids."

Best way to end sexual intercourse in a relationship

I want suggestions on the best way to end sexual intercourse in a relationship, of which 'that' used to happen; suppose break up is not an option.

Now, its hard, unless the partner is very very understanding, because no reason will seem reasonable enough, as long as the sex has always be there. 

My parents rejected my choice and want me to marry a girl of their choice!!

Hi. I am a guy of 26 yrs, based in Ghana. I have a girl of 21 yrs. We 've been datin for 2 yrs now. I truly love dis girl and she also loves me very much, she can't do anythin without me. The problem is, my parents are forcin me 2 marry when I introduced this girl to my parents, they ingnored her because I am Nigeria and the girl is ghanian. As time went on, my mother went to Nigeria to find a lady for me to marry. The girl accepted for to marry me without even seinge me. Now they brought her to me last week. The lady is more beautiful than the ghanian girl, but I don't hav any feelings for her like I do for the ghana girl. Please advice me, I don't want to disobey my parents, and I don't want to loose my first lover too. What should I do

Describe your ex in 1 word

Good morning fellas. Lets have some fun with this. Just, describe your ex in 1 word.

For mine, I'll say...........FISH.............yeah, and I have my reasons, but I'm not telling.......cos the rule says one word. ha ha ha ha ha

Virginity for sale. What do y'all think????

What do y'all think about that 20yr old Brazilian woman selling her virginity for $780,000?

Photo of the day!!!

Yeah, I know.........all my friends will say its me......ha ha ha ha ha ha.............Good morning fellas!!!!

How to keep a long distance relationship.....

I saw this somewhere, and I felt it'll interest a lot of us. Here it goes

A relationship in itself is not that easy to maintain for no one in this world is perfect – there will always be differences and flaws within both of you.

So how much more if you and your partner are a hundred miles away from each other? Do long distance relationships work? Well, it does, if you can do these three essential things in long distance relationship.

Continue after the cut............